October is a Boring Month Anyway

I mean really, I don't like Halloween and that means October is really just time after the summer and before birthdays, Thanksgiving and Christmas.  So I skipped it, at least for purposes of this blog.  But I was out there doing whatever it is I do to occupy my days.  

In this time I learned that trying not to care works right up until you start to care.  And when you start to care, it all goes away.  Its just the way life works.  At least for me.  The transition from caring to not is harder than the transition from not caring to caring but marathon and football watching with friends makes it easier.  Right up until there is a lull in the conversation and the silence crashes down around you, leaving you to wonder how you'd explain breaking inexplicably into tears without sounding like a raving lunatic.  And sometimes if you just express how miserable you are it makes it better.  Even if you decide the easiest ear is your engaged ex-boyfriend.  Which makes you pathetic in addition to miserable but at least not crying in the bar. 

I also learned that its easier to work out before work now that the clock have changed.  Its easier to eat well when there is good food in the house.  And yoga.  I like yoga.  And as we sit potentially on the brink of a great depression and our country is faced with a decision that if made poorly will be disastrous, I just hope for the "serenity to know the difference" because if you can't control you can't change it no matter how hard you try.

On Wednesday I age another year.  I hope this past month is not indicative of what the next year is going to be.  Argh.