A Marathon Haiku

While I did sneak a triathlon into September, I've basically been focused on training for the marathon the past few months. Unfortunately it turns out that writing about running 20 miles is only slightly more exciting then actually running 20 miles, so instead, I leave you with a little poem.

Marathon to run

Tomorrow to the start line

Tonight restless sleep

I'm overwhelmed by my own creativity lately. I'm sure you are too!

A Tale of Two Races - Part II

Local Olympic Tri in the Middle of NoWhere, NJ

or, the day I remembered that I love small home grown races, they're fun

circa late September, 2010

Before

At some point in my marathon training I was gearing up for a 20 mile run that followed a step back week. Just two weeks prior to the planned 20 miler I had run 18, but after an "easy" week with a long run of "only" 10, 20 was daunting. It seemed so long and far. Liz assured me that my muscles have memory and they'd remember what to do and it would be fine. And that 20 mile run was fine.

So, before the race I hoped that the same muscle memory logic would get me through this race for which I had done minimal (at best) biking and swimming preparation.

One of the best things about local races is sleeping in your own bed. It actually might have been a bit of a stretch to call this race "local" but having done the sleep in own bed and drive further v. hotel analysis, my own bed won. So it was local.

One of the best things about small races is that you can dilly dally a bit in the morning and getting there just under an hour before the start is actually plenty of time. I think I took two or three trips from my car to transition because it was just that close.

It was a bit chilly that morning so my wetsuit went on faster then it might have otherwise but before long it was time to get in the water for warm up. The race is in a pretty small lake, and I swam close to all the way across it while warming up. The water was much warmer than the air, so even after deeming myself sufficiently warmed up (when you've only swam twice in the past two months it is a fine line between warming up and tiring yourself out!) I stayed submerged.

The Swim

All things considered this was a good swim. It was a bit chaotic because, due to the small lake, you had to essentially double back across the lake before you were allowed to make the final turn and emerge. It seemed clear when you were standing on shore, but once you were in the thick of it, it was easy to disorient and now know how far you had come or how far you had to go.

My biggest issue with the swim? The dude that backstroked the whole thing - I went through the photos to confirm that this is indeed what he did (it is). He was actually quite a good backstroker but its hard to tell where you're going when you're looking up at the sky (or so I would imagine) so he kept crashing into me and/or crossing my path - it was frustrating and took some time to get by him but probably led me to speed up a bit to just get away, so maybe I should actually be thankful he was out there cruising along ...

Other than that, I swam well and met my goal of getting out of the water in under 35 minutes (at least according to my watch).

The race was only one wave and I was about in the middle of the pack which is a nice place for me to start the bike.

Bike
I've never been so thankful for pre-riding a course. There is just so much slow grinding up. My goal here was to stay focused and to ride as hard as a I could (because actually, riding anything short of as hard as I could would likely have meant walking) and to finish in less than 2 hours. I met all of my goals, finishing in about 1:57. Clearly this wasn't fast, but to put things in perspective, the fastest mph average of the day was 18. Its a hard, hard course.

Run
My goal for the run was to not finish the race last. I knew there were a few people behind me on the bike and perhaps a few catchable people ahead of me so I set out. The biggest issue was that the run was falsely advertised as flat. That run is a lot of things, but flat is NOT one of them. Later the race director would query whether anyone would actually have done the race if he hadn't lied! I finished the run in 1:00:27 (why do those :27 bother me so much? why?) - a 9:44 pace which, after considering that I've been stagnating at marathon training pace for awhile, isn't bad.

The Best Part
I had fun. I attribute it to the smaller low key aspect - I was far from winning, but really no one was out there to "win", everyone was there to do their best and have fun. The shorter distance might have also helped. And of course this:


It was a very, very, very small race. But I was second in my age group. And when you're me, you take awards whenever you can.

the end.

A Tale of Two Races - Interlude

Random Training
(or lack thereof)
Up and Down the Eastern Seaboard
(ie, Northern NJ and Massachusetts, I'm not really sure what a seaboard is)

circa September 2010

Between T-Man and the second race in this two race tale, I was supposed to rest for a week and then transition directly into marathon training. When I threw in a come back race I didn't really deviate from that plan.

Thus in the one month between the race in which I almost quit triathlon, and my comeback race I rode my bike 4 times (one of those times was the hybrid bike at the beach and two of those times were "easy spins" on the gym bike).

So that is one bike ride on a road bike between races. And that ride?

Well, I had planned to travel to the race site early one Saturday with a random girl I met on the internet (sort of - the triathlon club message board) and pre-ride the course. We planned and discussed all week and then the Friday before the Saturday ride I left work with a fever.

A smart person would have bailed. Note: I never claimed to be smart.

I took advil, napped, took more advil, ate dinner, took more advil, went back to bed, woke up and took more advil and drove with the random girl out to the race site. I might have taken more advil when we arrived. The night before this advil fueled adventure we realized that there was an organized course preview this day so we also had the opportunity to preview the swim course.

So what I'm saying is that I swam an open water mile and then rode my bike for 25 miles most likely with a fever that was only held at bay by the copious amounts of advil I had consumed in the preceding 18 hours. I survived, but barely.

This race was all uphill. There were tons of steep, 4 mph, ifIgoanyslowerI'lltoppleoverbutIdon'tknowifIcankeepupthispacebutI'malreadygoingtooslow-

toclipoutsoI'mprettymuchscrewedisthereanicepatchofgrasstolandin

slow. And when we weren't dealing with that ... false flats. The course started and ended in the same place so there were obviously also some downhills but they were the white knuckle feather the breaks and try not to die sort of downhills - the sort of downhills on which, if you're me, you can never make up enough speed to make up for the slow, slow, slow uphills!

Honestly, I can't imagine how the people the encountered this for the first time on the day of the race handled it.

Somehow, the day after this adventure, I managed to run 19 miles. I'm still amazed that I survived that weekend. But I did survive and I threw in one extra swim (for a total of 4 bike rides and 2 swims for those keeping track at home) and then headed to the race for real ...

A Tale of Two Races - Part I

Part I

T-Man Half IM, New Hampshire

or, The Day I Almost Quit Triathlon

circa August 2010

The Good

At the end of the day, I remembered that I participate in triathlons for fun. And fun to me is certainly "racing" my own best times and "competing" with myself, but it's also being out there suffering with and cheering for others and in turn being cheered for.

The Bad

For reasons that I can only sort of articulate, T-Man was not fun.

The Ugly

(aka, the reasons I can only sort of articulate)

The race is huge. I was good about getting things done early this year but the traffic and people still seem to take a lot out of me. Everything takes so long.

I was in the last wave. In a race this big, the last wave is over an hour after the first wave.

The conditions deteriorated as the day went on (and, did I mention I was in the last wave?). Thus, the water was choppier - disorganized lake chop - and I couldn't wait to be done swimming. That is never a good way to start a long day.

Starting that far back and being a less then super biker, made for a pretty lonely 56 miles. It also started raining. I dropped my chain. I forgot that the end of the course was net uphill.

I was happy to be off my bike but as I set on the run, I saw most of my friends finishing up the run. It was raining. I wanted to put on my sweatpants and hang out. But instead I had to run a half marathon. In the rain.

Maybe it's the back of the pack, or maybe it was the rain, but last year it seemed like everyone on the double loop run was cheering and chatting and having a good time. This year ... *crickets*. Except for the poor dudes who commented on my smile and friendly demeanor (seriously, this is one of the rare times in life when I'm friendly and chatty with strangers) the third time I saw them I made them promise to stay on the course until I passed them again. Of course as soon as they promised and I was pass them, it stopped raining and started pouring. I hoped they would go back on their promise and go inside. They didn't, they were still there as promised and it made me smile.

But, at the end of the race, I still declared myself unfit for triathlon. I was going to look for a new sport. Or maybe just run.

(More Good)

Then I drank a beer. Or three. And ate an oreo cookie, or 8, and remembered the good and started plotting a come back - I could find a small, local race perhaps reminiscent of my most favorite race and it could be fun ...

I woke up at 3 am unable to sleep and ate some more oreo cookies and looked up races on my iphone. One month later I would be back ...

One weekend in August

found this in the drafts ...

My mother has tiny, tiny feet and she claims that they used to be smaller - that while she was pregnant with me, her they grew half a size. Right before I graduated from grad school my feet grew half a size. And I assure you I was not pregnant. This leads me to believe that her feet would have grown that year regardless.

This summer, I feel like I've been nesting. I've done my share of travelling but sometimes, when Friday rolls around, I just want to relax, eat sushi, watch Friday Night Lights and follow that up with a mellow weekend at home enjoying August in the city with half the population at the beach. I can still assure you I'm not pregnant which makes me wonder if sometimes everyone needs to nest, regroup and then emerge back into the craziness.

Anyway, this nesting (or, if you don't buy into my theories above, staying at home and being anti-social) has left me with plenty of weekend time for training which is good because I have a half IM coming up. Two weekends ago I had volunteered to lead our club's less aggressive ride and woke up in plenty of time to pump up my tires and fill up my bottles. Plenty of time until the tire valve broke and I wound up needing to do a quick tire change and, unfortunately for me, "quick tire change" isn't really in my repertoire. I notified the group to head out without me - they offered to come help me, but I was too frazzled and knew that there probably weren't any less aggressive people there waiting to be led - and I took my time tire changing and left about 30 minutes late. This would have been fine but somewhere in the madness I ate like half a granola bar for my entire pre-long ride breakfast. If you've ever wondered if the pre-race/ride meal is really important, I'm here to tell you that it is!

I was rather starving in the middle of my ride (at which point I hate some pretzels) and in the middle of my run (at which point I stopped running and went home and inhaled some eggs and waffles) but I did get in a 4 hour ride 25 minute run all solo and was quite proud of myself. The first long, long solo ride of the year always freaks me out a bit and this year, this was the long, long solo ride. After eating I rested and headed down to the beach to meet some friends (b/c nesting or not you can't be reclusive all the time) and amazed them with the amount of food I ate before I declared myself comfortably full. I then told them about my 60 mile ride/2+ mile run and I think they found that more amazing then the post ride food.

After a fun night out I got up the next day, ate some breakfast (having learned my lesson) and headed out for a run. I told my friends I'd be gone for awhile but didn't let on as to distance. Pretty much as soon as I left it started pouring but it was kind of nice because it scared all of the people away and I had the roads to myself and I ran and ran and ran and jumped through puddles and wrapped my iphone in a garbage bag which kept it dry for 14 miles! And with that marathon training commenced.

Probably as close to the perfect combination of reclusive athleticism and summer fun as I'm going to get ...

There is hot and then there is HOT

or, NJ State Race Report

Somehow, going into this race I tried to pretend like the oppressive heat we've been having would not effect my day.  I thought I could just gut it out and be fine and have a great race.  And to some extend I did, I finished in one healthy piece, which makes a race great - but the heat definitely took its toll.  I pretty much switched from go go go race mode to survival mode when I felt the first bead of sweat drip down my bike as I walked to the porta potty.

Of course, when I stepped into the water for my warm up and realized that the water was maybe warmer than the air, survival mode took on a whole knew meaning.  The water was 85 degrees and it kind of made me gag - it was like swimming in pee (not that I've ever swam in pee, but you know).  You just knew that there was some nasty stuff growing in there and you weren't even afforded a wet suit for protection!

Now that we've established that both air and water were HOT ...

SWIM

The only thing I regret about this race is my swim position.  This race has had some bad experiences with weak swimmers so the RD was seemingly trying his hardest to discourage people from even getting in the water (I do see his point, but it was extreme to the point that I thought about bagging the swim and I'm a good swimmer) - in light of this and the fact that it was an in water start, I thought that to the outside and a bit back from the first buoy was a great place for me - right up until with barely 30 seconds left I realized that there were hardly any people behind me.  I tried to reposition a bit but when the gun went off I had ALOT and I mean ALOT of breast strokers to get through and while I've become more aggressive with my own swimming and less afraid of getting man handled, I refuse to be the man handler.  So it was slow going at first but I eventually found clear water and then went for it - I think that in the end my fear of what was growing in the water and the awful ear (or worse) infection I could get from it counter acted my fear of spontaneously combusting because of the heat!  I was :20 seconds slower but given my starting position, I'm not complaining.

Ts

I won't bore you with details, but both Ts were faster than last year and both were 2:27.  What are the odds??

BIKE

I somehow failed to notice that the one loop bike course was made into two - I noticed before the race, thankfully, but not say before I signed up.  All of the turning took away any advantage I may gain from a flat course.  I'm a wimp, I slow down when I turn, its ok.  Other the turning (and the head wind, I didn't like that either and if I'm going to complain I might as well complain) the bike felt good.  My pace was .1 faster than last year but my time was 8 minutes slower??  So apparently they made the course longer in addition to more technical.  Good to know.

RUN

Did I mention it was hot? And they ran out of cold towels at the cold towel stop and I thought about re-using a used cold towel (no worries, I didn't)?  I was glad that I had the experience of that crazy hot half marathon earlier this May because I knew that if I just went at my pace I'd be fine and the miles would tick off.  What was my pace you ask?  Well, there were three options: walking, running and not moving.  There was only one pace that I could run and it was SLOW but it was running and it got me to the finish even if it took 7 minutes longer than last year.

In the end, the race took 15 minutes longer than the year before but I left knowing I did the best I could with what I was given and knowing that the elusive sub 3 hour oly is still out there somewhere.  I also left thinking that with the change in this race course, I might be done with NJ state because ... its just not that pretty.  

Between Pat G. being over my brother's wedding weekend and being maybe done with NJ state next year could be a whole new adventure!  But first, some epic training stories and epic shopping at lulu (yikes!) and then ... Timber ... man!

Stay cool out there kids ... 

Scenes from Criminal Minds and a PBS Special

(with a triathlon thrown in for fun!)

Thursday after work I left much, much later then I had planned for my weekend getaway for the local (to my parent's summer home) sprint triathlon. It was a long, long night of driving but I finally arrived at the hotel where I was crashing before heading to the Island. The lobby was empty but the check in dude was nice enough and he suggested I leave my bike in the hotel's ballroom (at first this seemed odd to me but then I remember that many people travel with bikes - mostly beach cruiserish bikes, but whatever - to the island so the hotel clearly had a plan) - it was late and I was going to be in the hotel for less than 8 hours, so I said fine. I was totally down with the ballroom right up until he emerged from behind the desk and I realized he was like 8 feet tall and walked with a weird limp and he unlocked the door to the dark ballroom and suggested I bring my bike to its far back corner ... um, nothankyouverymuch ... scenes from every creepy crime show I've ever watched flashed through my head and I was certain that as soon as I was fully in the ballroom that door would lock behind me and I would belong to the 8 foot tall dude and he would keep me locked up for years. So I did what any good triathlete with a nice bike and an active imagination would do - I gave the bike a shove in the general direction of a table and hoped for the best - my feet at all times stayed firmly in the hallway of the hotel and I then went quickly to my room and double locked the door. Crisis averted!

Friday was a great, relaxing day and Saturday was the race. Really, all I can say about this race is that it was what it was. Its not an A race for sure and not really even a B race - its mostly just a reason to get away to my favorite vacation destination for a weekend. I obviously wanted to improve from last year but the conditions were so different that its almost impossible to compare ... but I'll try, starting with the swim (obviously).

I was hoping for a solid swim because I always hope for a solid swim, its the part of the race where I feel, well, solid. During the swim I felt way off course, but I always had people around me. I also felt like when we made the turn towards home you could swim and swim and swim and get nowhere. This swim is in the sound and it later became clear that there was some sort of current going on. Despite this, I was hugely disappointed to see that my time was 4.5 minutes slower than last year (10:56 v 15:28). However, post race analysis reveals that I had the 15th fastest swim of the 74 people in my age group and that the fastest female swim time in the WHOLE race this year was 10:40 ... so to compare the two is really apples and oranges and I was solidly in the top 1/4 so in the end it was all good.

Someone also told me that the swim was all anyone was talking about in T1. I didn't notice, I was too busy catching my breath after the long sand run and putting on my bike shoes and helmet 18 seconds faster then last year - and considering how hard I worked in the swim this year, that's impressive! Ha.

The bike is what it is. And it is just not long enough for me to get into a groove (not to mention I was stewing over the swim a bit) ... it was about 2.5 minutes faster (44:33 v 47:17) so I'll take it.

T2 was when I realized that there was a distinct chance that we would all spontaneously combust on the run. It was now about 1:30 and it was HOT. Despite this I moved through T2 12 seconds faster then last year.

The run was, as expected, HOT and it was one of those runs where you're trying and working but your legs just aren't moving quickly - it was about 2 minutes slower (31:15 v 33:25).

Overall my time was about 4 minutes off (1:38:06 v 1:42:01) but a fun time was had by all so I can't complain. My super athletic Boston friend got a last minute spot in the race and had the fastest female run time. That is THE FASTEST FEMALE RUN TIME. She was also 4th in her age group.

Unfortunately the next day she almost drowned in the ocean. Seriously. Literally. A good samaritan rescued her because we were not at a lifeguard beach and while I'm a solid swimmer I'm not down with the ocean these days. All an attempted rescue by me would have done is left two people to be saved. Prior to the incident I was thinking that I needed to come to terms with my ocean fear so I'm not one of those scared moms (not that I have imminent plans to become a mom) but now I think I'm down with being scared - I'll just add "not afraid of the ocean" to things I look for in a man. Anyway, keep this in mind for any trips you might take with me to the beach: unless it calm, you're on your own out there!

Seriously though, she didn't know that if you are caught in a rip tide you swim parallel to shore. Despite the fact that given the rough conditions, swimming parallel might not have been an option, everyone should know that, thus the PBS special. And for those that know me and could envision me freaking out, know that I was alone in that general part of the beach (there were others that would have heard me if I yelled) except for the good samaritan's friends who, like the good samaritan, might have been 12, and therefore I remained incredibly calm - I kept my eye on her so I could point her out to anyone else that might have been needed to assist and I was ready to call 911 (the only reason I didn't do that initially is that we were down a long dirt road and far from town ... it would have been too late). It was only later that I wondered what happens when you're on vacation with a casual friend and she drowns ... it freaked me out a bit, but in the end I was just grateful that I didn't find out the answers to that question!

I anticipate this weekend's triathlon to be much less eventful ... more on that later.

Stay cool kids!

2 days. 150 miles.

Given the number of times in the first 12 hours of my epic 150 mile weekend that I thought about not doing the ride, it is rather amazing that I can preface this story with ... this was so.much.fun! And I want to do it again! But, once I tell you about it, you will think I'm insane ...

Sitting at work on Friday, I really couldn't get my head around the fact that I was driving to Boston that night. By myself. I almost forgot to print directions and when I got home after work to collect my bike I sat on my couch and thought about just staying home. I didn't. I packed up the car and 15 miles into the 200 mile trip there was a detour. And traffic. And I almost turned back. But I didn't.

And eventually, 4 hours later I was in Quincy and could not find the hotel. I was so close but I just kept missing the proper turn - at 10 pm on a Friday night though I did not consider turning back. I eventually found the hotel and there were no parking spots. Seriously? Really? I eventually found some staff parking and in an effort to get everything packed up and into the hotel in one trip I spilled a bottle of water in my purse - under normal circumstances this would have been nothing more than an annoyance but it almost ruined my weekend.

An hour later after I was checked in, had made a few phone calls, sent a few texts, checked facebook etc. I went to charge my iphone and realized that the charger was wet and ... would not charge. My battery was LOW so I emailed the Boston people I knew that were doing the race and begging for an extra charger ....

I woke up early the next morning and read one email that said an extra charger had been packed when ... my phone died. Awesome.

I gathered up my stuff and headed out giving myself 45 minutes to travel 6 miles and get breakfast. Unfortunately the last mile of that trip took 1 hour - and that was without a breakfast stop. I parked when the ride should have started. Fortunately, it was delayed. I checked in, grabbed 1/4 of a bagel and a shot of coffee and could not find my team. And I had no phone. I had to put my luggage on the luggage truck but I had a decision to make: keep the luggage and head home or check the luggage and risk not finding anyone I knew until the first night's stop (at best).

I soldiered on and found the group with seconds to spare. Literally. Things were going ok - I knew I wouldn't be able to keep up with the faster group if I had any hope of finishing the second day so at the first rest stop I fell back with the next group which - as is typical of my life - was mostly couples. As we approached the second rest stop I decided I needed a bit of solo time to get my head together so I pressed on and ... got a flat.

I can change a flat. But its slow and I did not want the group to pass me because ... all together now ... I had no phone. So I did what I could in terms of changing the tire without really taking my eyes off the road. I basically jumped into the road to prevent the group from passing me and while I can change a tire slowly I get even slower when under pressure so I delegated what was left to one of the group. I kind of wanted to cry but he did great.

Or so I thought for 5 minutes until it went flat again. The guys in the group wanted to macgyver the tire together with a gel wrapper but I convinced them to let me SAG to the next rest stop (about 10 miles) and get professional help. Interestingly my SAG was a couple dressed in tiger costumes.

Don't ask. I didn't.

I still felt awful for taking up time and attention and wondered why I came on this journey once my friend bailed and I did briefly consider if there were any options that resulted in me going home but there weren't and the professional declared my bike to have a mere pinch flat that was remedied while I scarfed a turkey sandwich and chugged a pepsi that someone brought to me. They were awesome and once I was all set we were on our way and the experience ultimately led us to bond. Or at least led me to think we did because for the rest of the day I was much more at ease. Although I should note that in the latter half of the days there were hills. And I was promised a flat ride. Liars.

We arrived at the first night's stop, which was beautiful. I had a normal roommate who I had spent most of the day with. There were showers and food. Once I was clean I think I ate more then I've ever eaten in one sitting. And then we just sat around looking at the ocean, drinking beer, listening to music and rehashing the day. I was the flat girl - this was not a reference to my lack of boobs - by the time the story had spread up the line I had 5-7 flats.

Lights out was at 9 so we went to bed. And ... I don't think I've ever said this before, and I might not ever say this again, but I should have camped because that night in the top bunk was the hottest, most miserable, restless night sleep I've ever had. Lesson learned.

The next day was more of the same. Except there might have been more hills. And when it ended I decided to forgo the booze cruise and bus back to Boston to begin my 5 hour ride home.

Doesn't really sound fun, right? But for whatever reason it was. So much so, I'd like to do it again. Crazy.

Of course, it took me close to a week to recover and then it was the fourth and now I leave tomorrow for my favorite local but not local to me sprint triathlon!

Happy weekend peeps.

I swear I offered to circle swim ...

and a big weekend coming up!

Last weekends race is still in my legs and my arms, but I'm trying to work through it and not just sit around and eat cake ---

--- seriously, one day last week, I found myself post workout in the pharmacy after a run and I was starving and I totally gave in a bought the entemans chocolate cake with chocolate frosting that was sitting right there by the check out and the darn thing is still around - I eat a bite or two or three every day and it seems never ending ---

so I stopped into the pool yesterday and planned to do the master's workout that was sure to still be on the board from the morning. Usually after work the pool is packed, but I timed it right and got my own lane which was awesome. Mid way through the warm up a girl joined me and said we should split the lane which was great. Then a guy who either was or wants to be her boyfriend jumped into the lane. I paused to confirm that we were going to circle swim but before I could even say a word the dude told me to "just keep swimming."

So I did. And they essentially circle swam in one half of the lane. She just did her thing but when it looked like they were going to collide head on he dove and swam under her. It was actually quite impressive but had to look odd to anyone watching - I wondered if any random people on deck thought I refused to circle swim? Reminiscent of my camp announcement that this was "not my bike" I wanted to put everyone on notice that I do in fact have good pool etiquette.

Anyway ... this weekend my plan was to go to Boston with a friend/neighbor and do an MS 150 ride with some people that I work with on occasion. As is my life, my friend bailed last minute. I've decided to be brave and go alone because I've realized that there are some things in life that you'll just never get to do if you sit around waiting for the right person to do them with. I'm actually more worried about the driving then the two days of bike riding - I know the people I'm riding with will stick with me but they live in Boston so when the ride ends, I'm on my own. I won't tell you about each of the 150 miles, but I'm sure it will be an adventure worthy of a blog!

Two 'Fer

Before we get to my two for one PRs (yes that's right, one race, two PRs ha ha), let me just note that aging up is ... interesting. Other then with myself, I'm probably one of the least competitive people you'll ever meet (or not meet as the case may be) so age groupiness is really irrelevant to me, but I found it incredibly interesting that there were over 3xs as many people in the 35-39 age group as in 30-34 and those ladies are fast! It seems like an odd phenomena to me, no?

Anyway, it was Pat G. time and I was sooo ready for this race. For one, I'm a big fan of repeating races I've done previously - its a great way to judge overall progress. For two, I LOVE this race. Its so low key and just easy. And in a lake. And at an amusement park. And for three, it was my first race of the year and I've been training a ton and I was just ready!

When I was preparing for this race, Liz commented that I have race plan creation down. And I do. This is old hat now, so I'm going to spare you the nitty gritty of how we got there and what we ate for breakfast and get straight to the good stuff.

Swim

Last time I did this race I went way off course and swam into some geese. I also suspected the distance was long. This time, it was pretty much acknowledged that despite all the literature saying this is a .9 mile swim, its really a 1.x mile swim. I stayed on course, drafted when I could, kicked an old man in the face and finished exactly 6 minutes faster (and what are the odd of it being exactly six minutes faster? last time I swam x:27 and this time I swam (x-6):27. strange). I was psyched. I am also psyched because that time included 90 seconds of running back to transition so this makes me excited for my HIM distance swim.

T1

I'm not big on comparing transition times race to race. So much is dependent on rack placement and wet suit cooperation. But I will not that even this was 25 seconds faster.

Bike & T2

This time the course was about 2 miles shorter due to construction. Despite this I knew more or less what to expect. I expected to go down, down, down and then up, up, up and to repeat that several times. I did. In the detour I also climbed up something so ridiculously steep that I was basically pedaling from soft spot of grass to soft spot of grass so that if forward movement ceased to be an option, falling over wouldn't hurt. Fortunately, forward motion was always (barely) an option. Liz advised me to play "how long can I fend them off" with regard to the women that I would come out of the water ahead of. I played the game and it was fun while it lasted! My bike + T2 time for this race was 14 minutes faster (and 2 miles shorter) then last time. I've been told to stop talking about the missing two miles because it was only 2 miles and they were on the bike and the detour was wicked. So I will stop talking about it and note only that no matter how you cut it, 14 minutes is a solid improvement.

Run

I noted last time that this double out and back course was up and down a mountain. The terrain hasn't changed, but this time it only seemed like a big hill. That in and of itself is an improvement. In addition to an improvement in my geographical perceptions, there was an actual 5 minute and 6 second improvement (and it felt great, even after swimming and biking I was flying - for me- on the down hills and flats and making it up the ups and cheering and chatting with my friends that were out there double out and backing with me). And not only was it a 5:06 course PR it was ... a 1:42 distance PR (beating a record from 2004). I guess I just need a long warm up.

The 10K PR left me with a total time that was almost 26 minutes faster then my previous time racing Pat G.

And that is the story of how I got two PRs for the price of one and did it surrounded by friends that make me super proud. I am super psyched for the rest of the season and hopeful that this race is indicative of how the summer in general (cheesy, but true)!

Goals

We all need them.

In fact I have some for my triathlon this weekend (more on that later).

I also have (at least) one to be accomplished within the next 365 days (hopefully less).

Specifically, I need a date to my brother's wedding which is in ... 367 days (you see why I'm hoping for less then the allotted 365 days - their caterer will thank me).

I'm taking suggestions/solicitations/introductions whatever. There might be a prize (which might be limited to good karma and my charming smile) to anyone who helps me to this goal.

Maybe he'll be at the triathlon this weekend - in which case I hope we don't meet because he tries to drown me. I'll keep you posted, but in the meantime, if you see I have a slow transition - assume I'm brushing my hair or putting on lipstick;)

Camp Highlights

There are a lot of posts floating around out there about our women's tri camp and since none of you really want to know about how I got to the airport or the details of getting our rental car (although the enterprise dude sure was friendly), I'll spare you and just hit the high points:

• For a long, long time I resisted the call of lululemon. Now that I've given in I'm worried that I might be addicted.
• Illinois is big. Getting around it requires a lot of driving.
• Driving a SUV when you're used to driving a mini cooper is interesting ...
• I like open water swimming but only if I remember my body glide.
• It is possible to ride 60 miles on a bike that it much too small for you. But, it might be better to learn how to travel with your own bike.
• Tailwinds rock. Headwinds? Not so much.
• Never underestimate what you would do for cold water.
• If the dog chases you stop pedaling and say "no" firmly. Shrieking and riding your bike into a corn field is less effective.
• Good new friends are the ones that give you the towel soaking in their cooler of ice water.
• Sleeping through yoga is totally socially acceptable.
• Never underestimate what you would do for cold water (in the pool).
• Running up and down a highway overpass is about as fun as it sounds.
• Sometimes telling someone to act like they are "really chopping wood" won't actually help them do the "wood chop."
• 99% humidity can turn to torrential rain quickly. Driving through torrential rain is less fun than it sounds.
• Elle & Neil make the best breakfast ever. Seriously.
• Beer at the airport makes flight delays more tolerable.
• When your flight doesn't land until 1 am the extra money spent to park in short term parking is worth it.

Camp in a nut shell. Happy weekend everyone!

Chicago Bound

Again.

Every time I tell someone that I'm headed to Chicago this weekend for some "triathlon stuff" they get excited about the Chicago part. And while I'm happy enough to be going to Chicago, a trip there lost its allure about 20 trips ago.

My first trip to Chicago was senior year in high school (technically, senior year had ended I guess because I had already graduated) and we flew there a few days after I was un-wait-listed at the college I attended. We flew into O'Hare and drove the 2-3 hours to Northern Indiana and toured the campus (and asked for a copy of the letter proving I was in ... proof is always nice, just in case). Now that was an exciting, memorable, life changing trip.

And there have been other great times in Chicago ... my first Cubs game, visits senior year, the Incident at the Irish Oak, bachelorette parties that taught me who my friends were and weren't, beautiful runs, crazy New Year's Eves, post college football games, meeting parents and being nervous to meet parents (for some reason that was a one time thing, of course flying in on the bomb scare plane probably didn't calm my nerves) ... etc.

I've often thought about moving to Chicago. Still do sometimes - even though the people that made me want to live there in the past are all in suburbs more-or-less, the midwestern lifestyle (that many deny exists) still holds allure. That and the Well Fit training center. Of course, then I remember that the coldest I've ever been in my life has been in Chicago (did you know that your teeth can get cold?).

So for whatever reason, going to Chicago isn't that big of a deal to me. Its kind of like going to the mall except it takes longer to get there.

Packing for this trip however is a big deal. I couldn't sleep last night and right now the thought of packing is exhausting so it will have to wait until tomorrow (after I bribe someone to take the pedals off my bike and before my 7:30 am flight). I don't think I've ever made a written list of items needed for a trip but ... if there is any hope of me not forgetting anything I think I have to now. So, for most of you, this is the end of the blog:)

Pajamas

Toiletries

Camera

Garmin & Charger

iPhone, ipod & charger

Book

Granola Bars

Tri Clothes for under wetsuit

wetsuit

cap & goggles

towel

bike shorts, sports bra, jersey, vest, jacket, socks, bento box (?)

bike gloves, shoes, pedals, helmet & sunglasses

sneakers, running shorts, visor & hat

real clothes (Saturday night)

bathing suit

running shorts, sports bra, shirt, socks

biking shorts

different shirt, capris for yoga

real clothes (Sunday night)

running shorts, sports bra, shirt, socks

real clothes (travel home)

3 water bottles

fuel belt and bottles

6 bottles worth of gatorade

10 or so gus

flight & rental car information

directions to various places

It doesn't really seem that bad all written down. But I'm sure I'm missing something (Sara?)?

Sort of Maybe Update.

I was email bantering with a friend the other day and he commented that there hadn’t been a blog update in awhile. Usually I have things to write but I have trouble finding the time until one of my 3 fans comments that I’ve written nothing in awhile – then I find the time. Because that’s me, always aiming to please. And usually I like to write and to post stuff in the space.

Usually. But not lately.

Lately I have nothing to say. Or I have things to say but they don’t fit into the so.much. fun theme. Its not that life has totally ceased to be fun – it still has its moments – but I’m caught up in the boring suckiness. And I don’t want to be the girl that writes about the boring suckiness …

So that’s where I’ve been. I think there is a forest for the trees analogy that could come into play here. Maybe.

Anyway, today, I came back again to wanting to write and to write something here. I figured if I paid enough attention something worthy of a blog post would happen and sure enough, when I got home I looked at my bike and realized the rear tire was flat. After dinner I set out to change it and the first try took, a long long time and I had a few moments of “I am never going to be able to do this and I am going to have to take the tire to the shop which is so embarrassing” but eventually I got the tire on and decided to do it again and the second try took a long time but only half as long as the first time. Success. Twice. It’s the little things.

Sometimes you have to work at what you want. And that doesn’t just apply to tires.

Of course, in my 4^th (I don’t count the first danskin year) year of triathlons I should be a little bit better at this, but its not my fault, it’s the bike tire gods’ fault. They’re the ones that only gave me 3 flats in these past 4 years- two in the past 2 weeks. Hopefully I’m good for the season nowJ

Although, did I mention that when the tire changing was all done there was a lone screw lying next to my bike? Yeah, no idea where that came from. Hopefully no where important ...???

And there are other things on the horizon – things more fun than changing a tire. A newish bike fit that I think makes me hate the bike less (despite the flats), new sneakers if my achilles ever stops hurting enough for me to actually run, a fun girls weekend trip to Chicago when I’ll meet Liz and workout and hopefully see my college roommates and their children and a 150 mile charity bike ride in the Boston area.

I used to think I’d meet my husband in a field in Iowa during a cross state bike ride but on further reflection, Boston seems like a much more likely scenario.

So … I’m going to try to cheer up (even though its hard) and try to become a better tire changer (even though its hard) and try to write more things on this blog … because if I focus on the non-sucky things maybe I’ll see the forest for the trees or the trees for the forest. Or something:)

Random Thoughts

1. If you live in an apartment building and want to have an all out screaming, yelling, cursing fight with your girlfriend/wife/lover and you opt not to use your inside voice, you risk people like me listening intently while we wait for the elevator to take us to the gym. People like me who then scrutinize every couple that lives on that side of the elevator bank and wonder if it was them. I really need to get to know my neighbors better. And I hope it wasn't the newly wed couple, but they do live closest to the elevator bank and anyone else would have to have been yelling really loudly.

2. Sometimes you spend the day in a weather/hormone related crappy mood obsessing about the state of your (non) dating life and how you're destined to spend the rest of your life alone and when you hear the couple down the hall having a screaming, yelling, cursing fight you realize that maybe the state of your (non) dating life is just fine, thank you very much.

3. Sometimes you also stalk an old person of interest on FB and realize that yes he is married but he also has serious man-boobs so again, maybe the state of your (non) dating life is just fine, thank you very much.

4. What exactly goes through your head when you decide to elliptical in just a sports bra?

5. More importantly, what exactly goes through your head when you decide to elliptical in just a flesh colored sports bra (or really do anything in just a flesh colored sports bra - in fact, what goes through your head when you buy a flesh colored sports bra?)?

And we will call him Matt.

or, Dave was right.

Last night, I learned gym dude’s name.

Publicly at least. Privately, I’ve known it for awhile.

The conversation went something like this: “My NCAA brackets suck. What is your name?”

Actually, first we talked about my brackets sucking because of two particular picks only one of which we shared. I mentioned that I was obligated to pick those picks because I attended both of those schools. He was super impressed with my smartness. Or at least my ability to get into schools that people have heard of. Or that play in games that are broadcast on TV.

After we established my pedigree, I asked the big name question. So now we’re friends. Marriage will probably follow soon.

And Dave was right. It wasn’t that hard (of course Dave might have proposed me proposing we get a drink – a step I’m not ready for). So if I continue to take Dave’s advice, the next easy thing on my list is to buy a tri bike.

QOD

A marathon is like life with its ups and downs, but once you've done it you feel that you can do anything. - Anonymous

True. Which is probably why I finally signed up to do another one. Of course for now, I'm reserving the right to defer!

A Decade in Review

(because all the cool kids are doing it)

I spent the penultimate (heh, love that word) day of this decade at my parent's house drinking a martini and playing wii. I thought it was a good way to end a not particularly good year. The next morning I was one block into my drive home, stopped at a stop sign when another car skidded into me. I'm really not mentally prepared to handle things like this and after I called the police, and insurance and the tow truck I declared I was cancelling my trip to Vermont and (once someone transported me to my apartment) I would never leave again except to go to work, the grocery store and maybe the gym.

It was rather reminiscent of how I kicked off the decade - freaking out about the world potentially ending before I even graduated law school. Going to Costco the day before Y2K will do that to you - people were stocking up on generators and bottled water like we were gearing up for nuclear war. That year, I eventually pulled myself together and headed to a party with some friends of law school friends at the beach. Like everyone else we watched the new decade begin in country after country and nothing catastrophic happened. I might have been accused of over reacting.

By the second half of 2000 I was in my 3rd year of law school and ready to be done. Apparently that is a common occurrence although I think I had an extreme case of it. To get me through and shake things up a bit, I befriended a 2nd year law student (we shared a night class and he had a car - a great catalyst for friendship) who would go on to work at my firm and who had gone to college with me (although we didn't know each other) and made his friends mine for the rest of that year. Many of those people arrived in New York a year after me and are still part of my circle of friends. I spent 12/31/00 in Chicago and wondered if maybe committing to New York was a mistake. I know that Chicago would have worked out fine, but I'm pretty sure New York was the right choice. At the time, I just wanted something with no law school association and Chicago was all college.

In 2001 I graduated from law school, took (and passed) two bars and spent 3 weeks before my new job (and the end of life as I knew it began) in Europe (Prague, Vienna, Venice, Florence, Cannes, Dijon & Paris). Then the day after I signed my first Manhattan lease, the world fell apart. Somehow I handled that much better than Y2K - I guess tangible horror is easier to deal with than horror of the unknown variety. Ten days later I moved in and started work. I think the sadness all around me made the newness of work and city living easier to handle. Any feelings of loneliness or disconnectedness were really nothing compared to what was going on around me. And you couldn't help but feel inspired by the way the city came together.

I think I worked more in 2002/2003 than ever again in my career. I remember regularly arriving home from work at 5am on Saturday morning and heading back to the office on Sunday. I went on my first business trip which was also my first trip to California and for the first time rented a car and drove myself to the hotel in the dark (funny how that was anxiety causing then, but now I wouldn't give it a second thought). I felt like I was a kid playing grown up and was impressed that I pulled it off. In the winter/spring of 2002 I dated the teacher and the lawyer but both had disappeared by the summer which was fine because there was too much work to allow for any sort of balance.

All of the work I was involved with finally ended or came to a natural pause at the same time - the Friday before labor day weekend and I found myself lost and slightly despondent (and by despondent, I mean just plain out of it - free time for socializing was a novelty) as I realized that I would be able to enjoy the weekend and the much anticipated football game and scrambled to come up with a plan. My former 2L law school friends were arriving to New York as was the ND football team for the Maryland game at Giant's stadium. They came to my rescue and convinced me to head to Jersey for a party the night before the game. I went reluctantly, taking the long way and listening to sad music and drinking coffee on the train. I knew that I needed more than just work in my life, but with the teacher and the lawyer gone, I wasn't sure where to look.

Sometimes I wish the insane busyness at work had lasted one more week. [ha ha]

Because, it turns out I didn't have too look far. That night I met Ryan - I believe we complimented each other's sunglasses. Mine were children's sunglasses purchased in France during my post bar trip. Ryan's were from one of the Chicago festivals near the Irish Oak. Funny what we remember. Anyway, Ryan reads this blog sometimes. So ... that was a fun, drunk, flirty weekend that cheered me up and got me excited for the fall in general and then of course more specifically when we stayed in touch and visited and then became a couple. Seven years later I can admit that success in that scenario would have been hard to impossible, but at the time I couldn't imagine an ending that didn't involve a house in the suburbs and a kid by the time I was 30. It was easy and comfortable and made the hours I was working a means to an end. Plus I got to get out of town to Chicago and see my college friends on occasion. It was my first grown up relationship and while it was fun and easy and comfortable while it lasted, it was crushing when it ended. Fittingly on Labor Day weekend (and over the phone [insert snide comment]). Fortunately I had just purchased season 1 of 24 on DVD. I think I watched all 24 hours in 2 days because every time I stopped, I'd hyperventilate.

For the most part it was a miserable fall of 2003. And while its easy to place blame for that, I probably would have been fairly miserable regardless of who I was or wasn't dating. I was again super busy at work and at some point, no matter how much you like your job (and I did still more or less like it then) the inability to have a "life" gets to you. I recall it being touch and go for awhile, but somehow, despite the busyness I made time for Brian's wedding after which Ryan made out with another girl and then called me at work to change his flight and ask to stay at my apartment. Which I allowed because I'm a schmuck. But it at least made the transition from sad to angry complete (although it took a few days to really get my head around that situation)! My friend's (now ex) husband also came to town twice that fall and hit on me both times. I remember wanting it to just be quiet but there was all this chatter and it made me want to scream. Fortunately, around then I started running with a group in central park and that saved my winter. When you're running it is quiet except for your breathing and I liked that. I needed that. I met some great girls and ran my first 10K (it snowed and was made a 'fun run' so I have no idea what my time was).

Running made me feel connected to the city for the first time since living there. And since I started running, I've tried to run in all the cities I visit. One of the group's coaches, Jen, mentioned once how running is a great way to get to know a city and I couldn't agree more. It was also a great way to at least feel like I had a life despite the hours I was working - I could sneak in a run before work (or when normal people are sitting down to dinner - and then I'd head back to the office) and at least feel like I had done SOMETHING.

I went to a lot of weddings in 2003-2004 many of which I was in. I travelled to Virginia in a blackout and risked eating little gnats that felt the need to die all over the place. I learned that weddings can ruin friendships and suspect I may never agree to be a bridesmaid again. I also ran a lot of races - enough to qualify to run the NYC Marathon in 2005 - and tried to be more New York by going to fancier bars and restaurants. Basically I tried to become the anti wholesome relationship girl (to the extent you can while still enforcing all my ND rules). It was fun, but maybe not fulfilling.

By 2005 I was tired. Towards the end of 2004 I met Mike, I moved to Hoboken, someone threatened to send me on a business trip that would have prevented me from running the marathon, I got out of the business trip, I turned 30 and I ran the marathon. It was a lot. I then stayed with Mike for months longer than I should have, just because I didn't know what to do next and being with Mike afforded one a lot of time for rest.

In 2006, when my relationship with Mike finally ended I felt a profound sense of relief. On the surface I was sad, but deep down I was ecstatic and terrified that I would repeat this horrible mistake. That not quite a year is one of the few things in the past decade and maybe my life that I regret. I feel like it spiraled out of control and all I wanted was for someone to tell me it was wrong and needed to end, but no one did and so I stayed because it seemed, on the surface at least, like the thing to do. I still can't imagine how I'll trust myself if I ever actually start talking to boys again.

For the end of 2006 and well into 2007 I celebrated my freedom. Some might say I went on a bender:) But, I l like to think that I was just taking advantage of my surroundings, embracing the city on my terms which happened to involve a lot of irish bars and beer and bar food. It was fun. I also trained for and raced my first triathlon - a sprint. It of course came at an awful time work wise, but I got through it. And sucked Sara into this madness in the process (I've never seen such a willing accomplice!).

In 2007 I made some large purchases pretty much all on a whim - a bike and an apartment! I went to Pat's wedding in Costa Rica and spent the week pre-wedding with Sara, Scott, Dave, Ara, Ryan and Ryan's now wife and somehow everyone got a long (at least to my knowledge) and it was probably one of the best vacations I've ever been on. There was pretty much nothing to do except relax - we ran, drank, swam, sunned, hiked, played cards, laughed uncontrollably and then saw Pat get married and we all headed back to our real lives. While I was gone, the senior associate that I worked with ALL THE TIME, had a baby and upon my return I picked up much of her work.

And wile her maternity leave was hectic, it was eye opening. When she returned, I didn't want to continue being her junior associate when it was clear that I had managed more or less her work load on my own. Unfortunately (at the time, fortunately in hindsight) it soon became clear that my options were limited. Therefore ...

In January of 2008 I started my second grown up job. A life changing decision that I have yet to regret. More then anything, the new job gave me time to have a real life. I have some semblance of control over my life so I hired Liz, did one half IM in 2008 and two more in 2009 (one of which - Rev, was the hardest physical thing I've ever done - I still have my race number on the refrigerator and think of it often!). I joined a summer share. Made new friends. I have time to cook dinner and/or get drinks after work. I started skiing again and took a trip to France! Other then France and Rev, nothing in the past 2 years has been epic, and it certainly hasn't all been rosy, but its been good and it launched me in to 2010 and a new decade ready for ...

More.

This post has been around for awhile, but I hadn't put it up (and am only now putting it up because Dave responded to a post that was over 3 months old so I felt I had to put something new up) because while it was a fine decade (not awesome, sometimes depressing and bad, but for the most part tolerable and fine) it ends with wanting More. And while on some level I guess we should always want More, this particular version of More is hard. I can stand up straight and smile (and maybe finally tell gym dude my name) but for the most part there is little I can do to make More happen. For someone like me, accepting that is hard. I'm used to trying and practicing and getting some incarnation of the goal of the moment. But with More, I realize (although its still hard to accept) that whether or not More happens and the exact form it takes is out of my hands. So even though its hard and seems to get harder everyday, I'm focusing on living and being and having fun and not hyperventilating or obsessing over More.

And I've been working out a ton and broke the "no sports with balls" rule and started paying tennis - a game that is sure to result in some funny stories. I'm sure you can't wait!